Soho News
General Musings
Stars Wars: De-George-rized:
As it so happens I had a epiphany about myself and watched the despecialized versions of the original Star Wars Triogy te other week.
I think the general malaise of Disnaey Star Wars has been so demoralizing that I forgot how much I liked the original trilogy.
At first I only watched the bluray version of A New Hope, with added George-isms, but after realizing i went back and got myselfthe fan made despecialized version.
And man, those movies, especially A New Hope, is so so so good. Its the porno of scifi.
I found myself giggling at C3PO and R2D2, Harrison Ford might have been the hottest man alive, Carrie Fisher was such a Girlboss(tm) and Mark Hammil was also there.
The Pacing, the Action, the original practical effects, its all a symphony of the things that made scifi so great.
Watching Empire and Return the following days was also nice. For a long time Empire was my favorite of the three, but that may have been because it was so ellusive when I was a child (I was introduced to Star Wars at 8 years old or so)
On rewatch I found it really bold in the context of the trilogy, it kinda meanders after the big battle at the start, but the cloud city sets are really nice (also was pogging at ice cream maker guy), and Return was the simple finish of the three, with the most striking part being the beginning
Jabbas palace and Sail Barge are just so good setting wise.
But I cant shake the feeling that the specialized versions of these movies have kinda a place in my heart too, dont get me wrong, the decision to go back and add those (now) bad looking cgi extras is pretty baffling (but also kinda relatable, from a artist perspective wise, you always look at your old stuff wondering how to improve it and I think old Georgie isnt all too different + he loves tech).
Anyway, as I said, I kinda missed some moments that had been memed to death (maclunky, koo mii tee, etc etc,), and maybe it is just me watching a lot of astrogoblin lately (formerly funhouse), those guy love stars war.
But I couldnt help it, I guess you can place it in the larger fascination with early animation my fellow GenZ's have (Bee Movie and Shrek come to mind). There are probaly some psychological studies on that.
Either way, the despecialized version is on the internet archive, its a really cool passion project and you should watch yourself a Stars War if you want.
Columbo:
I mean the quintecential comfort show these days, seemingly everyone in my circle has been watching it. So I got myself some copies and started too.
The Pilot movies are really fun, Columbo was way more rude in that, I only remember him from wathcing the show at my gandmas after school and my image of him was the more established version.
But it was actually kinda cool, though I do like the somber Columbo more, the bumbling fool doesnt need to be rude, I think thats what sets it apart from other cop proceduals.
Columbo Weiner Mobile
Tomodachi, OCs and letting your life run adrift:
That fucking game has ruined me.
For basically the last decade I looked at people with OCs and thought to myself: "that seems kinda neat, I should try it."
And no matter what I did, I couldnt get anything to stick. I was kinda jealous. Ttrpg characters, videogame characters, just shit I made up for the sake of it.
Gone within months, after a campaign ended, or a game was played through. It didnt click, untillvery recently. It kinda started with Larp-Bot, a robot OC tat I made kinda as a pfp placeholder.
I started making monthly profile pictures changes and for a year they basically featured variants of that OC, nothing consitent at first but it refined itself over time.
Then, I actually forgot when/how they got to be, I made my anthro Lynx OC Olof. And I feel like at the time I was rewatching Lupin III and something clicked and I thought to myself: "I gotta put that cat in situations".
That it is the year of the train helped because it allowed me to draw some nice dynamic chase scenes, nothing elaborate just small doodles but it was nice, also added my third OC to the mix becuase someone ad to drive those trains. I actually have to continue drawing trains, I guess general burnout has been weighing on me recently.
Anyway, on the 16th Tomodachi Life Living the Dream released, and what do you need for that game? Characters to add to your island. Lots of people add people they know, actors, characers from media etc.
I kinda knew I had to add my then three OCs, but those weren't enough. The game lets you add 60+ Miis to the island iirc, so I scoured the archives and added any designs I could find, and came up with some characters on the spot.
The Mii maker of that game lets you customize your characters pretty well so that also worked as a creative outlet. Naming all those characters was the worst part, naming characters is always bad, no matter if for ttrpgs or comics or slef indulgance.
So I just named them the most obvious shit, often bastardizations of their character (Ipod the Isopod, Lizerd the Lizard, Moff the Moth, Hornet the ... Hornet).
I also made a slef insert and some elaborations on the LARP-Bot line of robots (its a whole thing).
Anyway, for the first time in maybe a decade I feel like I can relate, and I find it incredibly interesting that it is probably during my (and the world) most darkest times in recent history.
And I cant help but wonder if this is some sort of coping mechanism.
I dont want to get into it, I feel like a case can be made but Id just write some pseudo psychology babble.
3D Mainichi Modern:
A wonderful indie animation made in windows movie maker, the humor is suureal and delightful, and it has some really fun music (still waiting for a full version of the anomalocaris song), there are two episodes out already.
Check out the pilot here: https://youtu.be/2VNkfGgy3BQ?si=WiaSvbdU23FUDlwi
Insane ramblings
Looking at all my work is so fucking funny, most of it is made for a medium and genre I barely can stand anymore lmao.
I have generally fallen out off love with fantasy and ttrpgs after some situations I blame in part on myself
I wonder if other people go through this, they surely must. I also wonder if that plays a role in me not knowing what to draw, it probably does.
Sometimes when I look at my work it just feels like a thing to do and on bad days pointless. It doesnt help that I am literally addicted to drawig, going feral when I can't, sounds like a joke but it really isn't.
I should do some more introspection on it. Maybe I will learn something, doubt it tho, I don't have the mental faculties anymore to muster any more maturity I think.
I don't think I can go on with just creatively pissing in the wind too though.
Its a interesting feeling. Ive been reading a lot about the dadaists and how a lot of them enthusiatically went into the first world war,
because they thought the experience would elevate their art and in the end it did, just not in the way they thought it would.
In the same vein I thought about if just any brash experience could do the same thing with mine, but I doubt it.
I would probably just draw huge boobs with that experience anyway, as more vulnerable and abstract art I made in the past got mocked pretty harshly or at best ignored.
Brings me to loathing ones audience.
A principle I hold pretty high in my mental cabinet of artistic engagement.
I fucking hate, people that comment on my work, I think it stems from the days where I was still playing war thunder and drawing tank doodles and I would always get some shithead in the comments going "thats not how that looks" with no elaboration, even on doodles that were super cartoony or my own designs.
The shallow compliments I get these days are a refreshing wind, though they do still bother me to some degree. Though that stems mostly from myslef I think? I am very concious about what I comment online on others art so seeing people just throw out whatever seems strange to me. There is also a lrge dose of impostor syndrome in there I think.
The comments of the Gundam creator have been making the rounds on social media lately that basically are:
I fucking hate gundam fans because they are fucking stupid and don't get it.
I don't think thats me because I have not created anything to "get" I have created a body of works that are rather self indulgent, shallow in meaning and not educational at all in any way.
Mayb that is what I am lacking with it, a message, something to teach. But then I would just open myself to the same fate as the gundam creator.
Watching idiots enjoy something you create is already infuriating when what you made is meaningless. I can't fathom how it would feel if I actually tried to say something with the art I make.
I think it would drive me insane.
Maybe thats what I am lacking, something driving me insane, or the bravery to create something that could drive me insane.
Obviously not insane in the clinical sense but insane in the abstract, something that makes you want to keep on reitterating, returning to a message because this time people will get it.
And I guess thats what was wrong with George Lucas too maybe. Idk I only read a few interviews of his. maybe he is just a hack fraud.
whatever.
Various Arts
